we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
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In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
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I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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