Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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