I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
sex in a hospital.. check
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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