its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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