Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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