What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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