You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
it glows. i had to have it.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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