He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize