remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
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...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
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Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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