This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize