my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
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