maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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