No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize