Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize