Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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