Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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