she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Can I color on your dick again?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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