By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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