I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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