When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
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As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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