whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize