the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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