it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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