3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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