I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Success! We fucked roommates!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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