My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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