Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
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