I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
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Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
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I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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