First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just invented taco cereal.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize