It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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