similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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