...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
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