Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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