i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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