dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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