In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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