I love black thongs
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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