Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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