she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize