I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
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It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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