I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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