You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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