so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Randomize