I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize