ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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