I wanna passion pit in your ass
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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