i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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