Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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