people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
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