perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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